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Rolling into the office on a Friday morning tired as all get out is never any fun.  What’s worse is when you are talking about how tired you are with your 24 year old coworker and realize she’s tired because she was out partying until 2am, whereas you went to bed at 10 but couldn’t fall asleep until midnight because of the caffeine in some super dark chocolate ice cream you ate earlier.

30 is still the jam though.

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Last Friday was a day of total geeking out for me. 

First, there was a sample sale at WFM, meaning you grab as many supplement samples as you want and you leave a donation for them.  I raped this sale.  I’ve now got a year supply of protein powder and some really expensive cocoa powder.  Antioxidants, y’all!

Second, there was a one-day only sale on salmon going on at the store.  I bought 4lbs of Alaska Troll Caught Salmon for 8.99 (before my discount). Ye-ah!

Third, the New Girl Summer Bus Tour came through town and I went.  Dragging my Mom of course.  If it wasn’t for her, I probably would have gone home empty-handed (aka with no shirt).  She won me a pair of glasses, as seen in the pic, but I was able to trade it out for a t-shirt later.  You know me and t-shirts.

This is not the first time in my life I wished I had some non-prescription glasses to wear.

My geeking out ended about noon and I was EXHAUSTED.  That’s what good geeking out does to you.  It also makes the workday fly by.  Holla!

I know I really need to get this blog fired up again.  I’m doing a baby post today.  Gotta get my feet wet. 

One of my pet peeves is when you send someone an email, text, etc and they don’t return it.  It’s like it just went off into la la land and you have no idea if you’ll ever get a response.  Happened to me this week at work as I was waiting on a reply to an email I sent a couple of weeks ago.  Which I followed up on again Monday.  Then again on Tuesday.  Then again on Wednesday.  I mean… $hit has to get done around here, give me a response. 

Side note, one of my many talents is applying song lyrics to real life situations to make me feel better about them.  Immediately, this song came to mind and it’s sorta my theme song this week.  It’s jazzy and really, who doesn’t love a little Phil Collins on a Friday afternoon? 

By the way, I finally got a response.  Somebody’s listening.

This happens to everyone at some point or another… you’re at your desk, carrying on multiple IM conversations and you accidentally send the wrong message to the wrong person.  Today, I was talking to a co-worker about my Urban Dictionary word-of-the-day, while carrying on a conversation with Amy about UT football tickets.

Today’s word is “mouse arrest”.  Which means getting grounded from the family computer.  I don’t know if it’s because it’s Friday or what, but I thought it was funny.  After sharing the word and definition with my coworker, I began to type the sample phrase they include, but of course, I sent it to Amy accidentally.  Whoops.

Me: Do you know what face value are for them in that section?

Amy: I think it is $75

Me:  ok, so those you found are probably FV

Amy: the UT box office has $75 as the price for all tix for that game
            Stub Hub has some for $65-68
            not much of a difference

Me: I’d say go ahead and get those and I’ll just work on getting the extra ticket
           from our family friend… unless  you can wait a week or two.  

          after my mom found my pornfolio, she put me on mouse arrest

 Amy: haha

 Me: sorry… wrong IM

 Amy: hahahahaha
          I still really enjoyed it

Totally a random thing to IM and I’m just glad it went to Amy and not someone else who’d I’d feel uncormfortable discussing my “pornfolio” with.

To update all of you who have been on the edge of your seats awaiting the results from my biometric screening… well, I wish I had more exciting news to report.   I’ve only earned myself a few more percentage points of a discount.  Thanks to having an “optimal” cholesterol.  Whaaaa?

My cholesterol report came in the mail last night.  It was the last piece of information I needed to find out if I’d make my discount goal or not.  I opened the envelope, expecting to see a total cholesterol in the 140-150 range where it’s been the last few times it’s been checked, and my jaw dropped when I saw 202 on the paper.  I couldn’t believe it!  Over 200!

I had a mini panic attack as I racked my brain thinking about what would have changed over the last 2 years to increase my cholesterol so much.  Was it stress-induced from studying for the CPA exam?  Was it that I incorporate more red meat into my diet and less fish than I used to?  WHAT COULD IT BE???

When I got to work this morning, I analyzed my individual numbers more closely and started to research what they mean.  Turns out, according to WedMD and every other source I found, my numbers are actually in the “optimal” category.  And my ratios are extremely good.  My LDL cholesterol (the bad kind) is 103 and the normal range is 60-130.  My HDL cholesterol (the good kind) is 86 and the normal range is 40-60 (but the higher the better).  My triglycerides are 65 and the normal range for those is 0 to 150.

So, what gives Whole Foods?  Why you gotta be hatin’?  I’m going to try eating a more plant-based diet, including more fish and less red meat (which doesn’t bode well for the 1/4 of a side of beef I just won in an auction).  I can get rescreened again in a couple of months to see if I can bring that LDL guy down a tad to get the better discount. 

But for tonight, I’m going to enjoy that lean steak and a glass of red wine (which lowers cholesterol, thankyouverymuch) and not feel a bit of guilt!

Just as I was getting ready to leave for work today, I looked outside and it was pouring.  I decided I had better drive across the street to work today.  After I grabbed my car keys and headed out to the garage, I saw my car, still glowing after being freshly waxed on Sunday, and decided I didn’t want to risk getting it dirty in the rain.

I went back inside, threw on my rain jacket and sneakers, and then bolted out the door.  I sprinted across the street to work and arrived to my office soaking… and sweating a little. 

My decision was totally normal, right?

Starting Saturday morning, I will be embarking on a 2 week booze-less, sugar-less, unhealthy food-less challenge.  I finally became eligible to get my biometric screening done, which depending upon my numbers, could increase my WFM discount from 20% up to 30%.  My blood pressure and cholesterol have historically been very good.  It’s just my dumb BMI that’s going to keep me from the 30%.  I figured by going hardcore for the two weeks leading up to my screening I can hopefully get the best discount possible.

I’d start tomorrow, but why put a damper on the Royal Wedding day?  I’ve been hearing about it everyday on the Today Show for the last 4 months… I feel like I have a lot invested in this day and I need to enjoy it. 

I’ll report back on my results.  I know you will all be on the edge of your seats.

WHAT?!?  Who in the hell hijacked this blog?  Emily never loves her job.

Tis true, my friends.  Of course, I’m still new and don’t really know what all I’ll be doing yet, but so far I love my job.  People are friendly.  There’s no dress code.  You can work the hours of your choosing.  You can work from home.  You work above the most magical grocery store in the world.  The get 20% off at said magical store.  You get to work in the store during the holidays (for fun, if you want).  The kitchen cleaning products used are Mrs. Meyers brand.  There’s a fresh supply of almond milk, soy milk, regular milk and half and half in the fridge.  And the icing on the cake, you ask?  There’s a freaking Vita-Mix in the kitchen.

Love.

It’s really nice to have friends with completely different occupations than your own.  When you trade emails during the day, it’s always entertaining to hear what they are up to during work hours.  Case in point, this is how Nana is spending her day:

“Alright, time to look over some IQ test results (not mine) and meet with a 4 year old who keeps spanking his classmates. Good times.”

Makes me appreciate my 10 key (aka calculator) a little more.  Not really.  Being able to spell H-E double hockey sticks upside down loses it’s luster after a while.  Children spanking children is much more enlightening.

Remember back in May when I told you this story

Well, yesterday morning my co-worker’s wife called at about 10am saying she was going into labor, so he grabbed his things and rushed out the door.  I’d been begging another co-worker of mine (who is due next week) to hurry up and have her baby on my day, so I was elated that there was a chance this other baby would be born on October 7th.  I waited all day in anticipation of news and by the time 5:30 rolled around I left work without any updates.

Guess what?  They had the baby last night!  For one thing, I’m super happy this girl is going to grow up with the coolest birthday, but for another… the stars in my universe aligned again! 

I can’t tell you how neat it is to me that this baby was due on Peg’s birthday and ended up being born on my birthday.  Call me crazy, but I think it was her way of wishing me a happy birthday.  And all I can do is smile!