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I know I really need to get this blog fired up again. I’m doing a baby post today. Gotta get my feet wet.
One of my pet peeves is when you send someone an email, text, etc and they don’t return it. It’s like it just went off into la la land and you have no idea if you’ll ever get a response. Happened to me this week at work as I was waiting on a reply to an email I sent a couple of weeks ago. Which I followed up on again Monday. Then again on Tuesday. Then again on Wednesday. I mean… $hit has to get done around here, give me a response.
Side note, one of my many talents is applying song lyrics to real life situations to make me feel better about them. Immediately, this song came to mind and it’s sorta my theme song this week. It’s jazzy and really, who doesn’t love a little Phil Collins on a Friday afternoon?
By the way, I finally got a response. Somebody’s listening.
Today, I spent the better part of the day watching the below video. After watching it more times than I’ll admit, I have dreams of re-creating it in the same fashion as my Regina Spektor video from back in the day. Maybe now that I’m 30, I can see things much clearer than before, because it’s pretty obvious to me today that I have obviously missed my true calling in life. As anyone who has attended a wedding with me in the last six months knows, I’m a big fan of interpretive dancing. It’s just one of those amazing skills that I possess.
Clearly, I was meant to be a backup dancer on Solid Gold.
To update all of you who have been on the edge of your seats awaiting the results from my biometric screening… well, I wish I had more exciting news to report. I’ve only earned myself a few more percentage points of a discount. Thanks to having an “optimal” cholesterol. Whaaaa?
My cholesterol report came in the mail last night. It was the last piece of information I needed to find out if I’d make my discount goal or not. I opened the envelope, expecting to see a total cholesterol in the 140-150 range where it’s been the last few times it’s been checked, and my jaw dropped when I saw 202 on the paper. I couldn’t believe it! Over 200!
I had a mini panic attack as I racked my brain thinking about what would have changed over the last 2 years to increase my cholesterol so much. Was it stress-induced from studying for the CPA exam? Was it that I incorporate more red meat into my diet and less fish than I used to? WHAT COULD IT BE???
When I got to work this morning, I analyzed my individual numbers more closely and started to research what they mean. Turns out, according to WedMD and every other source I found, my numbers are actually in the “optimal” category. And my ratios are extremely good. My LDL cholesterol (the bad kind) is 103 and the normal range is 60-130. My HDL cholesterol (the good kind) is 86 and the normal range is 40-60 (but the higher the better). My triglycerides are 65 and the normal range for those is 0 to 150.
So, what gives Whole Foods? Why you gotta be hatin’? I’m going to try eating a more plant-based diet, including more fish and less red meat (which doesn’t bode well for the 1/4 of a side of beef I just won in an auction). I can get rescreened again in a couple of months to see if I can bring that LDL guy down a tad to get the better discount.
But for tonight, I’m going to enjoy that lean steak and a glass of red wine (which lowers cholesterol, thankyouverymuch) and not feel a bit of guilt!
Normally, I wouldn’t expect to draw any wisdom or advice from “Cougar Town”, but this quote I definitely appreciated:
“You can’t hear the world laughing at you if you’re laughing harder”.
I love laughing at myself. Guess it’s healthy!
Just as I was getting ready to leave for work today, I looked outside and it was pouring. I decided I had better drive across the street to work today. After I grabbed my car keys and headed out to the garage, I saw my car, still glowing after being freshly waxed on Sunday, and decided I didn’t want to risk getting it dirty in the rain.
I went back inside, threw on my rain jacket and sneakers, and then bolted out the door. I sprinted across the street to work and arrived to my office soaking… and sweating a little.
My decision was totally normal, right?
Starting Saturday morning, I will be embarking on a 2 week booze-less, sugar-less, unhealthy food-less challenge. I finally became eligible to get my biometric screening done, which depending upon my numbers, could increase my WFM discount from 20% up to 30%. My blood pressure and cholesterol have historically been very good. It’s just my dumb BMI that’s going to keep me from the 30%. I figured by going hardcore for the two weeks leading up to my screening I can hopefully get the best discount possible.
I’d start tomorrow, but why put a damper on the Royal Wedding day? I’ve been hearing about it everyday on the Today Show for the last 4 months… I feel like I have a lot invested in this day and I need to enjoy it.
I’ll report back on my results. I know you will all be on the edge of your seats.
It’s good to know there are others out there who are in the same boat as me.
It’s only fitting that as I start an 8 week semester of CPA studying hell, three books get released that I’d actually be interested in reading. And by “interested in reading” I mean read through in their entirety. Starting and neglecting books is a bad habit of mine, but I’m fairly certain anything written by David Sedaris, Augusten Burroughs (where have you been lately, sir?) and Chelsea Handler would not fall into that trap. Something tells me the other two on this just released list won’t fall victim either.
In no particular order…
How To Build An Exceptional Life by Jillian Michaels
Bossypants by Tina Fey
Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me by Chelsea’s Family, Friends and Other Victims
What can I say? The three of these peeps motivate me and not just to read. One motivates me to exercise and eat healthy. One motivates me to laugh. And the other… well, she motivates me to drink. Three very important tools for enjoying life.
And, in case the Easter Bunny reads my blog, I’ve already ordered the first two, but haven’t ordered the third. It doesn’t come out until May though, so it’s not possible to put it in my Easter basket. However… last time I checked, my Easter basket has PLENTY of room for Starbucks gift cards. Wink wink! Hop hop!
The other day, as I was doing my dutiful job of watching Rocky drop Lincoln Logs, I was approached by a random passer-byer. She made some kind of random comment/joke about watching my dog poop and I gave her the courtesy laugh and assumed that once she walked on past us, that would be the end of our interaction.
As Rocky and I proceeded to go back inside my apartment complex, she turns around and starts walking towards me. She says, “Hey, do by chance have any herb to sell?”. I almost start to giggle, because I’m such a square that I would never in a million years have any “herb” to sell, let alone use (please no comments from the NYE peanut gallery). Of course, unless she was interested in the dead herbs I have currently resting in peace on my balcony. I would have been willing to make her a sweet deal on those. Instead, I told her no, but that she wouldn’t have a hard time finding any in this town.
So, either she was pretty desperate or I need to start rethinking my wardrobe.
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