Last night, my evening was spent on a blanket at the Dallas Arboretum listening to the sounds of “Elvis” with a bottle of wine, a Whole Foods salad and my besties. 

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World-renowned Elvis impersonator, Kraig Parker, performed at last night’s Cool Thursdays.  He was probably a smidge better than the Elvis impersonator I had at my 7th birthday party, but definitely didn’t call me up on stage to sing with him, nor did he give me a fake diamond ring with half the diamonds missing.  Believe me when I tell you I still have that ring.

After the concert, Mary and I went up to him to get a picture.  Being a jacka$$, I decide to ask for his signature.  I contemplate pulling my shirt down a bit and having him sign there, but instead I settled with my forearm.  Apparently, “Elvis” gets signature requests all the time… for all over the body.  I’m sure most of those fans are disappointed, much like I was, when he signs his own name and not Elvis Presley.  At what point does the fame of being an Elvis impersonator give you permission to sign your own name?  I don’t care how “world renowned” you are, sign it Elvis, dipstick.

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Minus the hot summer weather and the forgotten second bottle of wine, it was a perfect evening.